I recently received a invitation to an event honouring an acquaintance I know through a mutual friend. The event includes brunch at an expensive restaurant, go-karting, and paintball. The bill, our host estimated, would be about $300/person.
As someone actively saving for early retirement, the idea of spending three hundred of my precious freedom dollars on an afternoon is hard to swallow. But before you call me cheap, let me explain, because this isn't about the cost, it's about the fun value per dollar. Here's why: 1. Brunch, paintball, and go-karting: I actually don't have a problem with any of these activities. Separately. But what I've found is that, as much as I enjoy going out, the best part is going home. Brunch sounds great! Brunch followed by a bunch of activities? I just want to go home. A day like this doesn't sound fun, it sounds exhausting. And now I'm going to have to waste my money on it, to boot! 2. I could do so much better for that amount of money. Y'know what sounds way more fun? How about we all get together for a bbq. Forget hamburgers, we could get some nice steak, corn on the cob, caesar salad, and drinks for all for less than three hundred dollars TOTAL. 3. I get that not everyone is as introverted as me. Sure, you want to go out and do stuff, why not? Ok, how about we just go to a meal and paintball. You're stretchin' me here, but for goodness sake, who needs three activities in one day? Do you people run on some alternate energy source I don't know about? 4. This is for an acquaintance. I don't really know this person, and from the few times we have met, they haven't really made much of an effort. If we were honouring someone I truly care about, I would happily shell out the cash and more - as I am already doing for a close relative this July (it's wedding season, folks). The reason I'm so irritated about this is that I'm going to receive a lot of backlash for not going. "But we'll only have 2 people if you don't go!" "C'mon, you seriously can't make time?!" Of course I could, if I cared about this person. Every time I hear people complaining about how millennials will never be able to retire, I think about events like this. Yes, market conditions have gotten much worse than when baby boomers were working, and it now takes two incomes. But another part of the equation is the expectation that we now celebrate every event as if the person was royalty - at the expense of the attendees, of course. So, to make this short, here's a friendly PSA: Don't try and guilt people into expensive events for people they barely know. You've now put me in the difficult situation of having to tell you "Thanks, but no thanks."
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