Any time you hear relationship advice, people always mention the importance of date night. "Date night keeps the spark in your relationship," "date night is a chance to reconnect as a couple."
You should certainly spend time one-on-one with your partner and go places together other than, you know, your house. But what confounds me about this advice is the emphasis on spending. According these relationship "experts" sustaining a marriage requires nothing less than $150 dinners out every week along with romantic getaways to luxury resorts twice a year. I'm not sure if they're aware, but humans have been capable of maintaining relationships since long before things like restaurants and couples massages existed. Not only are these things unnecessary, I often find that they build up the experience so much that the real thing is disappointing. Today was a beautiful Saturday, so we biked down to our city's central park together. It's only about a 15 minute ride from our place and about 90% of it is on protected bike lanes, so it's a really nice ride. Once we were there, we sat under a tree on the grounds of a beautiful government building from the early 1900's and did some fantastic people watching. We even brought brie and crackers. Can you imagine a better afternoon? Well, sometimes we bring wine with frozen fruit in a water bottle, so I guess a delicious chardonnay buzz could have made it an 11 out of 10. The point is, all of this cost zero dollars (unless you want to include the cost of the cheese, which was a delightful Kirkland double creme. So, like, four bucks?). On top of that, we got some exercise and fresh air out of the deal. Fancy dinners can have their place if that's your thing, but why not try focusing on the whole reason you're on the date in the first place - to spend time together.
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May 2019
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